Monday, July 15, 2013

The Stoned Nailmaker’s
“Jump the Shark" Page Post Part III

In two previous postings1 I listed 10 TV shows in each and my opinion of when they “jumped the shark”. Here are ten more.

21, The Flying Nun.  A sixties abomination of desolation.  Thought up by the Prince of this world, Satan to undermine and discredit mother church.  That Satan does indeed control Hollywood is abundantly evidenced by this vileness.  The concept illustrates the extreme difficulty of  Hollywood in treating Religion seriously.  What Demonic host thought of the idea of a “Flying Nun” as anything but a most risibly STUPID idea.  Sally Field, who played the “Flying Nun” would spend many years in Hollywood exile for this show even though she deliberately got pregnant to get out of doing the show!?.  Years later it was discovered with much incredulity that Sally Field could actually act.  For delaying this discovery for years the creators deserve to be horsewhipped.

Cast of  The Flying Nun

22, Gilligan’s Island. What can one say of a show that is the definition of BAD, HORRID and EXCREMENTAL TV.  The sheer stupidity of the series from its really stupid plots to its cheap, phony sets to acting out of an elementary school pageant is awesome.  The problem is that the show was not designed to be deliberately terrible.  Comparisons with Married with Children fail because Married… was supposed to be terrible, although even at its worst it was never as bad as Gilligan’s Island was unintentionally.  The implications are frightening.  That and why would the castaways carry the contents of several mansions with them on a three hour cruise?
Cast of Gilligan's Island

23, The X-Files.  This is a curious choice of a show.  One of the most cleverly written, filmed and acted of TV shows ever, it was not a show for everyone.  I must confess that I am one of the people who never “got it”.  The show never seemed to make up its mind between parodying this sort of “New Age” paranoia and validating it.  I feel the moment the show started the long downhill descent was when Muldaur left and they decided to continue the show anyway.

Cast of The X-Files

24, Hogan’s Heroes.  Mad Magazine did a vicious parody of this show about what fun it was to be in a prisoner of war camp; what hilarious hijinks happened in Stalag 13 which says it all.  The parody ends with our Hero Hogan going to a death camp for more hilarious hijinks including jokes about gas and gassers.  For sheer tastelessness this show is only out “classed” by Jerry Springer and Tom Green.  A monument to bad taste and callousness.  A definite entry into Hollywood’s Hall of Shame.  A insult to the dead; no words can describe what an abomination this was.

Cast of Hogan's Heroes

25, Highlander.     A Fantasy series based on the movies (all except the first are bowel movement products).  Surprisingly the show worked even though if you examined its premises closely they fell apart.  The moment the show began to fell apart is when our hero under a delusion killed his teenage sidekick and they continued the show for another season.  Opps!! Big mistake.

Scene from Highlander

26, The Monkees.  Given that this show only lasted two seasons I feel it never jumped the shark.  But given that the “pre-fab” four were only pale shadows compared to the real FAB four, and created to make money for a TV network one wonders about the point of it all.

Cast of The Monkees

27, Medical Center.  Another medical show that lasted seemingly forever (14 years) and towards the end each episode felt like it took years also.  The turning point when they jumped the shark came after the fourth season when they started to repeat plots verbatim.

Scene from Medical Center

28, All in the Family.  Supposedly one of the most important TV shows ever.  (over)praised for its innovation.  The show was a near total rip-off of the British show Tell Death Us do Part, but cowardly, avoided the viciousness of the British show by among other things making Archie “lovable”.  Fortunately smart writing and very good acting saved the show.  However the show did decline has the makers of the show began to beef up the sentimentality and maudlinness. Defining moment Archie and Edith taking care of a lovable waif left on their doorstep in the last couple of seasons. This desperate strike for the crowd of TV viewers who are addicted to saccharine was positively evil.

Cast of All in the Family

29, Maude.  Maude gets elected to state Congress. This started the syndrome of having a character hold political office when the writers run out of ideas of what to do with a character.

Cast of Maude

30, Friends. Another in the crop of shows about a group of worthless pieces of shit, and an obvious Seinfeld rip-off. Although in this case instead of having like Seinfeld's four wastes of space it had six wastes of space. The show continues the tradition of being populated by characters that are better off dead.   (Preferably they are made dead in a very painful manner.)  Defining moment How do those two women afford such a fabulous HUGE apartment in Greenwich village without being high-class hookers on the side?

Cast of Friends
1. Here and Here.

Pierre Cloutier

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